May 31 2008

Relationships – ‘Our Belief System’

Category: Relationship Belief SystemOlya @ 6:54 pm

Our Belief System IP – IC


I’m back……… have a brand new grandson, almost 9 days old. Need to shake up all the relationship myths before he enters the dating scene…………………………..


walking on egg shells ..........

walking on egg shells ..........




Ladies have you ever felt so “into a guy” that – you just didn’t exist anymore?

Lost your identity and took on his!

Like you were walking on egg shells, totally besotted, if he moved all of a sudden, you fell flat on your face!

When we focus on a man – he picks up on it.

You’d think he’d be flattered, that we SMS him whenever he pops into our head. Pleased, maybe even find it adorable, cute, that we’re all hung up on him and can’t get our minds on our own stuff. ‘The things that make us happy’.

Guess What? – That Never Happens!

The moment he gets a whiff of us focusing on him, thinking about him, wondering what he’s doing – we’re lost.

He withdraws and our self-esteem goes down the drain.

Most men, just naturally move away from us when it doesn’t feel good to be with us, especially, when the woman he’s with is zeroed in on him.

Men may be simple, but they’re not stupid.

For the most part, men use their gut instincts more than we do – they pick up on stuff.

Men may not be able to tell you what, or put it into words, yet they know how they FEEL, when they pick up on things. They don’t analyze their feelings like we do, they just feel an urge to move toward, or away from us, either want to touch, or not, without knowing why. They just feel like being there, or not being there. A clarity most women would love to have.

Men just don’t question their desires so much.

In Our Hearts – We know this to be true, yet it seems totally out of our control, or is it?

When you make changes on the outside – words/body language, things start to change on the inside. When you feel different on the inside, things change on the outside. 

Inner Parent!

Healing your Inner Parent, so that your  Inner Parent can make peace with your Inner Child, therefore the Inner Child will learn to trust again, and be happy.

Everything always gets better! 

That’s why it’s so important to Hold Onto Yourself.


Believe it or not – Women – are the ones in control of relationships. The Inner Parent working side by side with the Inner Child is a force to be reckoned with.

The keys to the BMW are always with us. The BMW goes nowhere without the keys, which we hold firmly in our hands. We are the fuel, we are the rich interior, we are the comfortable leather seats, we are the engine, we are also the sleek exterior, and we HAVE THE KEYS. We don’t hand them over anymore, the moment he shows any interest.

We don’t need to be on that emotional rollercoaster anymore, as we are in control, we hold the keys.

So Ladies – open your hearts, yet hold them ever so softly in the palms of your hands. Let your hearts be seen, felt, allow them to radiate vibrant, warm energy, yet always be in control, always keep a soft, gentle grip. Share the warmth of your heart, while always being in control, always holding the keys in your hands.

Open-hearted and soft on the outside, strong on the inside. You can do it! We have that inner strength.

We don’t have any control over a man – not one little bit – but we have lots of control over ourselves.

Because we hold the keys.

We can control our breathing – and even our heart rate. We can control the words we say, the tone of voice we use, what and when we say it. We can control whether we step forward or backward, and so many other things, that can change our own feelings of wellbeing, especially the way HE sees us – are under our control. We hold the keys.

– remember – ‘WE HAVE THE KEYS’

p.s.- have been doing some research on ‘Men in Relationships’ – RSVP is a very interesting source of information. Will share some of my findings in my next post.

till next time

love olya

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